I'm not a math fanatic, but this equation makes perfect sense to me.
This weekend I tried something with my friend Missy that was on my bucket list - Dining in the Dark.
If you've never heard of it, you are led to a dining table in a PITCH black room, where you are served a "mystery meal." Our server (for all those wondering how he served food - he had night vision goggles) informed us that the purpose of dining in the dark is "to strip away all preconceived notions about certain food, and open your mind to a meal by using your other senses."
Pretty scary for a picky eater!!! It's risky to EAT whatever is put in front of you, not knowing what it is. (The servers do NOT tell you what it is when they place the plate in front of you. They only tell you what utensil to use, and tips on HOW to eat it.)
Surprisingly, it FAR exceeded my wildest dreams. It was a ridiculously cool experience. I gobbled up almost every bite of all SIX courses! Amazing! Every bite was cooked to perfection.
At the end of the experience, when you are back in the (lit) lobby, the hostess hands you the menu, at which point you determine how amazing or terrible your tastebuds are at guessing.
About half of our guesses were wrong (which is a story for another time!). but I realized that there was at least one ingredient in EVERY course (if not two) that I do NOT like at ALL (mushrooms, asparagus, nuts, berries, etc...)
Had I read the menu beforehand, and seen the food, I would have been terribly unhappy that I was being served a bunch of food I didn't like.
However, because I was STRIPPED of my expectations (expecting that I don't like to eat x, y or z), I had a totally blissful experience. I was SO happy the whole time!
While it may not sound earth-shattering to you, it melted my mind once I considered the bigger picture. "How often to I have expectations about someone, or something, and end up being disappointed and not happy?"
The answer - a LOT!
Think about it - we are constantly placing expectations on people and situations, which they are A) unaware of and B) don't live up to.
We think a relationship should operate a certain way. We think an experience or event should be run another way. And then.... are disappointed when it doesn't play out the way we expected in our minds.
If I can drive any point home this week, I would scream in everyone's face "STOP WITH ALL THE EXPECTATIONS!" (in the most loving way of course)
Want a tip on how to identify your expectations quicker? Check this out -- anytime you feel disappointed, angry, or hurt, take a minute to mentally unpack why you feel that way.
Chances are, it stems back to some unknown expectation you placed. Let it go.
I once heard a quote that stuck with me --- "Expectations are disappointments in disguise." Think about that.
If you're wondering why I didn't use a photo in today's post, there's 2 reasons. 1) Since I learned this lesson dining in the dark, I wanted to illustrate my experience to you as best as possible, so a black background seemed to fit. 2) You expected me to have a photo. If you are disappointed I didn't have a photo for this week's post, it's because you had the EXPECTATION that I would. Let it go.
(I hope that was a "gotcha!" moment)
I challenge you to take the time and explore the expectations you place on people and circumstances in your life. And once you do, release them. All of them. It's not fair to the people around you.
I guaranteeeeeeeeeeeeee you will live SOOO much more happy and peaceful! It's freeing to let go of expectations. I dare you to try it!
Until next week, release those expectations. From situations. To work. To people. To Food! :) Don't you want to unlock true happiness in your life?
- Kimberly Faith
If you are interested in having me speak to your group, please contact me! I'd love to chat! :)